Indiana Jones and the Vending Machine of Doom

Yea so I dig up some change from around my desk hoping to dine on the fine delicacies that the vending machine offers. I approach scanning the selection looking for something to whet my appetite and what do I see? A Milky Way bar ooo man these things are so good and they are never in the vending machine, so I pop in my change retrieve my candy and march proudly back to my desk. Well here is where Indiana Jones comes in.... I open the wrapper and inside is the nastiest looking piece of candy I have ever seen... no joke it could be in a history museum it looks so old, but what do I do? I eat the thing and wash it down with a mountain dew... so I give myself about 10-15mins before I do the okey dokey shuffle all the way to the bathroom to expel the demon bar from my body.

"I ain't touching that candy bar shorty"